Both of Us My Life with Farrah

October 9, 1979
I'm still in a state of tranquility. Could this be love? I mustn't do anything to harm it. My little family needs someone of grace and goodness. Farrah and I talked and kissed till past 3 a.m. (no real lovemaking, yet). She said that since the moment Lee left for Canada she's been desperate to see me. I was stunned. This woman has kept herself in check for many years. We give each other strength and hope. Being fair to Lee is not the least of our problems. When I am sure, I'll tell him, for now I want to be with this blonde Angel of Mercy...oh mercy, mercy me. Tate will be both puzzled and thrilled. She's never really found a girl she could turn to, confide in, be a sister.

Reflecting back, I remember the insecurity that would take hold of me waiting for her phone calls, worrying I wouldn't be able to hold on to this extraordinary creature. She once told me she was the most recognizable person in the world, and I said, "what about Mohammed Ali?" She answered, "well, OK, the most recognizable woman in the world," and we both laughed, because it was true. Imagine the pressure of loving someone that millions of men fantasize about and desire? Imagine trying to be that woman, having to live up to your own poster. It would become an obstacle both of us would struggle dearly with, to the point of near self-destruction. But I don't know any of that now. It's still the beginning, when love is new and lovely to behold...

--From Both of Us